We Will Remember Them
I am learning to make my writing sound interesting. This week I am posting a Anzac presentation in honor of the soldiers who had gone to war and fought for us. I found this pretty easy, I guess I'm just used to writing, it is my favorite subject. Have a look :)
Kia ora Kahukura,
ReplyDeleteI really liked reading your poem. Your sadness, passion and pride comes through in your words. I like how you said "The smoke from their guns filled the air". It gave me a really good picture in my mind of what you were thinking about when you wrote it. Maybe next time use more adjectives, similes or metaphors to make your sentences more visual to give your reader more of a "picture" of what is happening. I can't wait to read more of your blogs.
Take care,
Whaea Cara.